The Commitment of Being Passionate

I am old.  I know because when I went to the ladies room at the Hard Rock Live, the attendant saw me looking at myself in the full-length mirror, messing with my hair and adjusting my clothes, and she said, "You look young."

I am also still a teenager. I have literally not taken off my black Adam Ant rubber wristband since I bought it at the concert. I flip it inside out at work so you can't see the part that says Antmusic for Sexpeople.

I have worn the bandana on my head like a kerchief, on my head like a hairband, around my neck like a scarf, around my neck like a choker, and for the first week or so I slept with it on my nightstand so it would be right next to me.  Also: apparently Adam Ant smells really good.  I thought maybe it smelled of cologne or something, but it wasn't really that chemical-y a smell.  I made Greg smell it and he identified it as scented body wash, which is exactly it, I think.  Clean, but not soapy; scent-y but not perfumey.  I did genuinely consider keeping it sealed in a plastic bag to preserve the wonderful smell.  I ended up deciding that touching it was more important than smelling it.  After three weeks, the smell is gone.

If I could go back in time and tell my seventeen year old self about all this, she would be embarrassed by the push-up bra, overjoyed at the idea of the front row seat, amazed at the thought of Adam playing his 1977 punk songs in 2012, and completely bewildered by my decision not to quit my job so I could go see every single show on the American tour.  Or at least, at least the ones on the East coast.

I am really considering an Ant-related tattoo.  I googled Adam Ant tattoos and found quite a few of his face, which is not a thing I would ever get (fond as I am of his face).  There were a lot of his Antwarrior logo, which is just perfect for tattooing, but not for me.

There were several people who got his signature tattooed on them, and and a lot of copies of his Pure Sex tattoo.  (As a person who is me, I absolutely adore the idea of the type of person who gets a tattoo that says Pure Sex and their own name. I mean it. )

His tattoo is a heart with a dagger through it, the banner
on the left says Pure, the one on the right says Sex, and
above the tip of the dagger it says Adam

In googling, I found a number of interesting pictures, including this one of James Franco, who did an Adam Ant inspired photo shoot for GQ Style.  Who knew?

Photo by Inez Van Lamsweerde and Vonoodh Matadi

It is entirely possible that one day I will write a blog entry about something else, and what a fine day that will be, whenever it comes.

Joy. Part II

Part I is here.

Then finally the lights went down, and the opening bars of Plastic Surgery started slowly, and Adam walked out, facing away from the audience while singing the first few lines.  

Oooooh

Then when the chorus kicked in he turned around and was right in front of me, performing right in front of me.  

Greg got some pretty good pics with his iPhone

"I've got a fetish for black

A fetish for green

A fetish for those arty magazines

I've got a fetish for blondes

A fetish for blondes

A fetish for blondes

A fetish for brown haired girls

I've got a fetish and that means I'm sick

So very sick

Any more for the Christian D'or?"

~Christian D'or

So many of the really punky songs, from before he was famous, from before the MTV Goody Two Shoes era, so many b-sides and album cuts.  Songs that I've never heard him do live before. Even singing alternate lyrics that I'd only previously heard on bootleg recordings of his pre-fame concerts.

"You gave me punishment, it lasted an hour

It made marks on my skin

I'm just a bundle of misery, girl

Since you kicked my cheekbones in

There's a whip in my valise, oh yeah

Who taught you to torture?"

~Whip In My Valise

I didn't take any pics, I was
too busy enjoying

But he also did a lot of hits (not all of them, he had quite a few, especially in England), and plenty of songs that everyone (it seemed) in the audience was singing along with.

Especially Antmusic.

"Well I'm standing here

what do I see?

a big nothing threatening me

it's so sad when you're young

to be told you're having fun

So unplug the jukebox

And do us all a favour

That music's lost its taste

So try another flavour

Antmusic!"

~Antmusic

And Kings of the Wild Frontier, which is still ringing in Greg's head a week later.

"No method in our madness 

Just pride about our manner

Antpeople are the warriors
Antmusic is the banner!
A new Royal Family, a wild nobility

we are the family"

~Kings of the Wild Frontier

See the bandana on his hip?

And I was so very happy, dancing in front of the stage, singing along with every single word of every single song. Adam looked fantastic, and believe me when I say that he wears 57 better than any man ever has before. He was energetic, dancing all around the stage, and looked as though he was enjoying the hell out of it. He sounded great, and his rocked-up versions of Desperate But Not Serious and Prince Charming were surprising and SO good. He did one song from his upcoming new album, and even though the song is currently unreleased, I knew a lot of the words just from watching YouTube videos of him performing it live.

"10:36 and I hope I've made
The right decision (nononononono)
Ninety eight point four's the bore
With twenty twenty vision (nononononono)
You want a thrill so you come and see me
A cheap line in fantasy
I'm still searching for the
Ants invasion
If I'd the courage
I would make my way home
Too many antics in the forbidden zone"

~Ants Invasion

Rock!

I've always kind of thought of myself as the perfect audience, I love to see people perform whether just in a casual conversation where they are holding court or on an actual stage, and being quiet and shy I don't want any of the attention and am happy to direct my full focus on the performer.  On this night I was probably the best audience anyone has ever been in the history of people, I am sure I looked happy, and thrilled, I was dancing with complete joy, and what songwriter doesn't love a person who has memorized every single lyric they've ever written?  As far as I was concerned, he was performing just for me. He was right in front of me, after all.

"I live the life that I've been left

I leave most things unspoken
But deep inside Geronimo
Is tearing me apart
Now's the time I must digress
From going through the motions
Take my head out of its sling
Free the warrior"

~Killer In The Home

The band and the backup singer were really good

He came out in a jacket, a white shirt, and a t-shirt, with various scarves and belts and straps and things.  At one point he took off the jacket, then later took off the shirt.  He pulled off a bandana tied to his hip and performed with it, wrapping it around his fist, around his neck, tying it around the microphone during Whip In My Valise and sexily pulling it tight.

Then he held it out, and the audience screamed and reached toward the stage with outstretched hands.  I was just dancing, and when he threw it in my direction I made a weak grab at it, but missed.

Greg caught it.  Greg told me later that Adam looked right at me, but I didn't see it, then Adam looked at Greg, Greg nodded to him, Adam balled up the bandana and tossed it directly into his hands.

I missed the whole thing, but I got the bandana.  I wrapped it around my hand and kept dancing.  It kills me now to think of it; clearly Adam Ant wanted me to have it. Is it safe to say he saw me loving his music and his performance, and wanted me to have it? I think it is.

That's my bandana wrapped around my hand

Adam performed twenty-two songs plus five more during the encore, he was onstage for nearly two hours. Being me, I had done a ton of research about his recent set lists, and actually had the whole list on a notecard in my purse. (Full disclosure - I also burned the whole set list onto a CD and made Greg listen to it nearly every day for a couple of weeks before the show.  You know, to prepare.)

Dancing

So when I heard the beginning of Physical I knew it was almost over. It's one of my favorite Ant songs, and he really rocked it.  Then he unceremoniously put down his guitar and walked offstage, just like he always did at the end.

One of the women I'd met before the show ran over and hugged me, telling me how glad she was that I got the bandana. Two other people from the audience told me I deserved it, since I "knew all the words".  (Good grief, I thought, could they hear me singing?)

And that was it. I wanted to sit down again, and Greg sat with me until the security people starting shooing stragglers out.

It was completely indescribable. He was brilliant, and I feel inspired and energized; I still feel it strongly a week later. It was such an intense, joyful, meaningful experience for me, I feel transformed.

Thanks, Adam.

Setlist:

Plastic Surgery 

Dog Eat Dog 

Beat My Guest

Kick!

Cartrouble (part 2)

Ants Invasion

Deutscher Girls

Stand and Deliver

Kings of the Wild Frontier

Wonderful

Whip In My Valise

Vince Taylor

Strip

Desperate But Not Serious

Cleopatra

Never Trust A Man

Zerox

Antmusic

Goody Two Shoes

Vive Le Rock

Christian D'or

Lady/Fall In

Encore:

Fat Fun

Red Scab

Get It On

Prince Charming

Physical

Instructions

Me: I don't want to sound selfish, and you know I have never asked anything like this before, but seriously: This is a miracle, something I was positive would never happen, and it just has to be all about ME.

Greg: I know, sweetie.

Me: Remember me telling you how Adam Ant would never tour again? With his mental illness and all that? I just can't believe it's happening. He's almost 60!

Greg: I remember.

Me: Even if I decide I need to do something that seems strange, like run in the second the doors open and then just sit and stare at the empty stage for an hour, you'll support me and do whatever I want. Okay?

Greg: Okay.

Me: And if I have to weep for a while, what will you do?

Greg: I will put my arm around you and let you cry.

Me: And if I have to weep for a while again later?

Greg: Same.

Me: And you won't get weirded out by my weeping?

Greg: I love your weirdness.  Do I need to put tissues in my pocket?

Me: No, I'm taking a small purse.

Greg: Got it.

Me: I mean, he's doing mostly old punky songs!  The ones nobody's ever heard of, the b-sides and the ones from Jubilee. I seriously can't even believe it.

Greg: I know, I'm excited too, I really like those songs.

Me: (tearing up) I know you do, and it just means so much to me to have you there with me and to share it with you.

Greg: It means a lot to me too.

Me: This part is very important, okay?  I don't know what it will be like, if our seats will be up against a barrier, or if we can go right up to the edge of the stage, or if most people will stay in their seats or what.

Greg: Sweetie, we have front row center.

Me: I know, but what if there's a space in front of the seats and people go in front of us? We can't let that happen!  I will be right up against either the stage or the barrier, in the very center, right in front of Adam, regardless. Okay?

Greg: Okay.

Me: And you will be right behind me, and you'll brace your arms on either side of me if people are pushing and shoving. Right?

Greg: Right.

Me: And if there are short people right behind you who might have trouble seeing, do we care?

Greg: No, this is your day and you are the only one who matters.

Me: That is correct.  And if the concert t-shirts are horribly expensive and overpriced?

Greg: We'll buy two, one for you and one for me.

Me: (tearing up)