Monday, April 17, 2006

"To Do" Now That I'm 40

Become poised, unselfconscious adult woman who behaves correctly in all social situations, and does not spill food on self

Go to Paris

Maintain swingy haircut with regular trims, instead of letting it grow just out of fascination at how mutantly fast it grows

Always wear sophisticated, matching underwear/bra sets

Become Kung Fu master

Behave as adult, not flopping into chair as a teenager; also do not make unattractive "oof" noise when getting back up from chair

Get new job that is creative and well-paid

Remove nail polish promptly at first sign of chippage