Thursday, July 24, 2008


You know who I hate? People who don’t appreciate how hilarious I am. One of the things I do at work is talk on the phone to the reservation agents in our call centers (one here in Orlando and one in Milwaukee). I am extremely funny, and it is just tragic how some of the people I speak to seem to be unaware of it.

Recent conversation, after I updated an agent’s schedule for them to make up some missed time:
Agent = It looks like, in my schedule, I have a thing that says make up time. What is that for?
Me = Sensors in the computer have decided that you are not currently wearing enough make up, and automatically scheduled you to put more on.
Agent = (long silence…) Really?
Me = No, not really. You got in late today, the make up icon at the end of your shift is for you to make up the time that you missed this morning.
Agent = Oh! (still confused) Um… okay.

You know what I don’t have ANY sense of humor about? Agents who call to ask me if they can hang up their phone because they have diarrhea. Lord, yes, please do hang up, and never give me that much detail again. Or agents who ask me for a long lunch so they can go home and change clothes, after having had a menstrual accident. Yesyesyes go now, and stop talking to me about it!

An agent called me a few days ago to ask if he could get off the phone for a few minutes to work on something, and his exact words were, “Ellen, can you get me off?” I, being ever the serious businesswoman, couldn’t help laughing. I restrained myself from making a crude but witty joke about getting him off. I doubt if he appreciated the effort it took.

I’m so underappreciated! :o)