Showing posts with label photographs. Show all posts
Showing posts with label photographs. Show all posts

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Trying To Keep Perspective, But Mostly Failing

I have never before been so stressed about work stuff that I just couldn't stop myself from thinking about it all the time, while at work and at home in those moments where my mind is not occupied by something immediate.  When I'm driving, when I'm taking a shower, when I'm doing the dishes, despite my best efforts to calm down and stop thinking about it I find my mind turns to work issues.

I have never wanted to write about work stuff on my blog, and I still don't but there seriously isn't anything much else in my head these days.  And I'm so busy, and so tired.

I work in a call center operations department, overseeing two call centers in two cities, totaling over a hundred agents and dozens and dozens of different types of calls coming in on different lines.  We use two main programs for this, one to watch/control the calls and one to watch and track the agents.  Both are changing, this weekend.

The new program to watch the agents is one that we have received a fair amount of training on, and a manual.  The training was all done in a hypothetical context, because none of the actual information that we will be using was loaded into the program.  Still, it was helpful.

To learn about the new program to watch the calls we were included, along with a dozen other supervisors and managers, in a web conference projected onto a screen in our training room.  The actual stuff that we will do, watching and controlling calls, was but a very small amount of time, and very hard to see on the screen.  And that's it, no training manual.

To say that we are panicking is putting it mildly.  My department is small, only 9 people, and we are all walking around like we are in a nightmare.  (One co-worker is actually having nightmares.)  One other co-worker looks weepy and confused, one keeps snapping at me and then apologizing. 

Our boss is a wonderful person who we all care about a lot, and she is having a very sad family emergency and has been out of the office most of this week.  Our sadness for her is not helping, and neither is the fact that she's not there.

Pretty much every other department is the same as ours, panicked and overworked and understaffed (two supervisors have left and not been replaced, two people on the technical team overseeing these changes have quit).

Like a cloud of doom hanging over our heads is the fact that our office location will soon be reconfigured to be 50% smaller.  We have no idea how this will happen or when it will begin, but the office manager keeps bringing people into our area muttering about knocking down walls and putting in doors.  When asked they tell us that an official statement will be coming at some point, they don't know when, but soon, within a month.  Until then we feel somewhat homeless, having been asked to clear out anything not vital from our cubicles.  None of us has even started with that yet, and unused bins sit stacked in the corner, a reminder that something is coming, but who knows what, or when.

We found out yesterday that a giant amount of information that was supposed to be uploaded into one of the new programs hasn't been, and won't be -- the company didn't pay for that upgrade.  I have no idea how that wasn't made clear to us earlier, but it means we will have to do it all manually, before Sunday.  It's extremely tedious and will take a really, really long time.

When I visited Mom last month, we went through some very old photos, and I found this one.  Mom laughed but was slightly appalled when she saw it, I don't think she quite approves of Dad having taken a photo of her so (in her mind) unattractive.  It must have been taken sometime in the late 1930's.

I love it, and I am sharing it, because it really makes me smile.

Written in her handwriting in pencil on the back is this.  It says, "Made just after I got up to the top of Stone Mt! Some climb --"



And here is the front.  I love this, and I feel a lot like this lately, especially when I am finally walking out of the building, across the parking lot to my car to go HOME.  Too bad I don't have a cute hat like that.

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Shut The Front Door!

As George Constanza said on Seinfeld:  I'm bustin', baby!

Whatever was preventing me from writing (writer's block? going through a natural process?  bad karma coming back to bite me in the butt?) is gone, and I am now back at work on my novel.

All I can say is:  WHEW.  What a relief!

To celebrate, here is my favorite photo of me, ever.  I am the wee baby and my sister is holding me.  As you can guess from her hair and frosted lipstick, this is in 1966.  Her husband walked in the room with a camera and saw us smiling at each other.  Awww.  Wanting to capture the moment, he said HEY to get us to look over at him, but he startled us, and got this pic instead.  Which is possibly even better than some boring photo of a smiling baby, don't you think?

I love how the little bit of drool makes my lips look shiny like hers.  :)



Can you see the family resemblance?

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

I Heart Photography

The first camera I ever got was a Christmas gift when I was around 10. This was the mid-70's, and it used those little rotating square flash bulbs that you would attach to the top, and they'd burn out after you used each side once. I loved my little camera, and wished I could take more pictures. It was expensive to buy the film, and the disposable flash cubes, and then have the pictures developed. I would get so excited when it was finally time to go pick up the pictures at the drugstore (it took a week or longer).

Since then I have always had a camera. I got my first SLR camera when I was in college and taking a photography course where I learned how to develop my own film in the darkroom. Once I got the hang of transferring the film from the teeny film canister to the lightproof developer thingie (which was tricky) it got fun, and I loved swishing the paper around in the stinky chemicals and seeing the image show up magically on the paper.

Even better than that was the invention of the digital camera, largely because I could see the image immediately (and just delete it if it was obviously bad) and because I could take hundreds of pictures at a time. I got my first digital camera about 6 years ago, and two years ago I got a digital SLR camera.

Oh, the unparalleled joy of being able to go to a party and come home with 250 snapshots of my family and/or friends. Oh, the unprecedented satisfaction of being able to set up a pretty flower in a lightbox and take 50 nearly identical photographs until I finally got the one that was PERFECT.

Sigh...

For Christmas my husband got me an external hard drive to keep all my pictures in. I use iPhoto to keep and organize my snapshots, and Aperture for my fine art photography. Total, I had around 40 gigs of pictures, which is a ridiculous lot, but I loved them all.

Did I back them up somewhere else also? No. Did I burn them to cds or dvds? No. Did I have stupid, poorly-thought-out fantasies about how quick and easy it would be to just grab the little drive and run if the house were on fire or we were evacuating due to a hurricane? Yes.

Did I ever once think about what would happen if our cable line got hit by lightning? Nope.

Did I weep piteous, bitter, self-loathing tears when our cable line got hit by lightning and my precious external hard drive was irreparably fried? Oh, you BETCHA.

The good news is that I had uploaded a lot of the really meaningful pictures online somewhere or other; to this blog, to my Facebook or MySpace pages, or to Walgreen's website to have them printed out. So some of the pictures of my Dad's last birthday celebration and my sister-in-law's wedding and other important events are not completely gone (though I usually didn't upload the full size versions). The bad news is that literally thousands of pictures are gone forever.

For the past few days, since we got the news back from the data retrieval place that our data was NOT retrievable, I keep thinking of specific pictures I'll never see again.

Mostly, the ones that really sting are sentimental. I had a few pictures of my kitty Zulie, who passed away three years ago. I had pictures of our house from before we moved into it, when the previous owner still lived here, and we were looking around trying to decide whether to make an offer.

Funnily enough, I also had one picture I had never shared with anyone; my friend knew of its existence and would be very glad to know it's gone. A big group of friends were at an outdoor concert downtown, and it was very late, and she was very drunk, and she decided it would be way too much time-consuming trouble to go stand in a long line at the bathroom, so she just squatted down and peed on the ground right there in the crowd. The thing that I found so hilarious (and the reason I was mean enough to take a picture of a moment I knew my friend would cringe over later) was the tiny, perfectly folded square of kleenex she held at the ready while peeing.

So, we have a new external hard drive and I am trying to think of this as a new start. I had been focusing so much on my silk painting lately I hadn't been taking as many pictures, so maybe this will inspire me...

No, this just SUCKS.

But I'll live. They are only pictures, I can live without them. And I'll take more, and I'll make sure this doesn't happen again.